i can't deny
you've changed me
desperately
so angrily
i can't seem to wash away
your footprints on my heart
and i know i shouldn't
but oh, the things i'd give now
for the clarity you give away
so easily
so frequently
and you don't know how i envy you
in your contentedness
i'm never satisfied
never satiated
oh, it's not you
it's what you've done.
not me
but who i've become.
posted by Teresa at 1:26 AM
If I had known then that these things happen, would they have happened with you?
posted by Teresa at 1:22 AM
i envy you
in your moments of clarity
i read them in the blurs across your face
so frequent
so illuminating.
and what i wouldnt give now
for a resolution to this sequence of frantic events gone wrong.
what i wouldnt give
for a way to put this glass back together
without being cut by the shards.
id love to freeze your expressions
or etch in stone your words
because i know they're all lies
and i'd like, just for once,
to show you you're wrong
i'm right, you're so wrong
and once in a while it occurs to me
that you're unaware
so blithe and unaware
of the violence in my head
of the turbulent struggles we face every day
and it occurs to me
every once in a while
you're apathetic-
in sharp contrast to my concerns-
some days i think
i'd like to be ripped apart
just one more time.
i can't remember what it felt like.
posted by Teresa at 1:18 AM
i unfold for you
the little space there is-
not enough to bloom-
but filled with the scent
of you and i turning into
you and me:
us.
and how ironic
life
turns out to be
as you're the one
i always watched
out the corner of my eye-
and i saw you through a haze
of ugly intentions
and misled impressions-
but you were patient
far more patient than i believed
one like you could be.
and slow and steady wins the race
you win my heart
unfold me now.
posted by Teresa at 12:45 AM
